I'm not usually one for new Year resolutions. I make them, I fail. What is the point in setting yourself up for a fall?
But with the coming of this New Year I feel the need to make some changes. A lot has happened in the last few months and it's time for me to make a few emotional leaps and what better time?
I have had several difficult conversations with ex-Himself over the last few weeks, the last of which found me telling him in no uncertain terms that he had to move on, there was simply no point in him ringing me every two weeks with the "You're the best thing that happened to me/I shouldn't have left/now I know what I've lost" routine. It's not helping him and it certainly isn't helping me.
But I've realised that I too need to move on. I need to move myself out of the adjustment stage, think positively and step forward and embrace my new life.
Which leads me to my second resolution.
I am having comfort zone issues. There. I've said it.
I can get out of the house and walk the hounds, go to work and go to the supermarket with no problem. They are all well within my comfort zone. But going out anywhere different has started to give me pangs of anxiety and I need to nip this in the bud before it really takes hold. I don't mean that I need to go partying every night of the week but I do need to push myself a little. It has been all too easy to come home and shut the door and lock the world away.
But with the coming of this New Year I feel the need to make some changes. A lot has happened in the last few months and it's time for me to make a few emotional leaps and what better time?
I have had several difficult conversations with ex-Himself over the last few weeks, the last of which found me telling him in no uncertain terms that he had to move on, there was simply no point in him ringing me every two weeks with the "You're the best thing that happened to me/I shouldn't have left/now I know what I've lost" routine. It's not helping him and it certainly isn't helping me.
But I've realised that I too need to move on. I need to move myself out of the adjustment stage, think positively and step forward and embrace my new life.
Which leads me to my second resolution.
I am having comfort zone issues. There. I've said it.
I can get out of the house and walk the hounds, go to work and go to the supermarket with no problem. They are all well within my comfort zone. But going out anywhere different has started to give me pangs of anxiety and I need to nip this in the bud before it really takes hold. I don't mean that I need to go partying every night of the week but I do need to push myself a little. It has been all too easy to come home and shut the door and lock the world away.
Now where is that switch that I need to flick?
It's not easy to get out of a comfort zone. You will have to take little steps and go flick that switch! Hope 2009 proves to be a good year for you.
ReplyDeleteIt is certainly not easy to get out of your comfort zone, but it will definitely be easier because you are recognizing it so soon. You will be fine Angela, you are a strong woman.
ReplyDeleteHappy New Year, my friend.
I know what you mean and you're right to try and get a handle on it now. I had to take anxiety medication for a short period about 9 months after I separated; the adrenalin had worn off and some fear set in. Luckily, just having the medication available seemed to help; I didn't have to take it much at all. Good luck and keep talking to your friends. Writing and knitting helped me as well. You can do it.
ReplyDeleteWishing you all the best for the year ahead. It's one of the great inconveniences of life that the older we get the less sure we seem to become in unfamiliar surroundings.Routine becomes almost like a security blanket.Often real change occurs over a much longer periods than we'd like or imagine.Adding a new experience (often chosen at random) once in a while sometimes helps break the cocoon of the old routines I find.Best wishes.
ReplyDeleteHow about a weekend in the cotswolds? It would be a step away and you can be as sociable or not as you want....
ReplyDeleteYou are always welcome here hon.
Emxxx
Em that's sounds bliss, thank you!
ReplyDeleteAri, I agree. I went over there this morning to see if there was some kind of badge....nothing!
You're welcome for a visit in Kentucky! It's pretty comfy here! Lots of whippets to cuddle and pasta - that about does it.
ReplyDelete