Sunday 5 October 2008

Investment tips for 2008 & 2009

With all the turmoil in the market today and the collapse of Lehman Bros and Acquisition of Merrill Lynch by Bank of America this might be some good advice. For all of you with any money left, be aware of the next expected mergers so that you can get in on the ground floor and make some BIG bucks.
Watch for these consolidations in later this year:

1.) Hale Business Systems, Mary Kay Cosmetics, Fuller Brush, and W R. Grace Co. Will merge and become: Hale, Mary, Fuller, Grace.

2.) Polygram Records, Warner Bros., and Zesta Crackers join forces and become: Poly, Warner, Cracker. (you need to think about that one!)

3.) 3M will merge with Goodyear and become: MMMGood.

4. Zippo Manufacturing, Audi Motors, Dofasco, and Dakota Mining will merge and become: ZipAudiDoDa

5. FedEx is expected to join its competitor, UPS, and become: FedUP. (snorting with laughter at that one!)

6. Fairchild Electronics and Honeywell Computers will become: Fairwell Honeychild.

7. Grey Poupon and Docker Pants are expected to become: PouponPants.

8. Knotts Berry Farm and the National Organization of Women will become: Knott NOW!

9. Victoria 's Secret and Smith &Wesson will merge under the new name: Titty Titty Bang Bang (mwhahahahaa!)

And finally...

10. Mother's Jams & Jellies and Smucker's Jams & Jellies will unite to be: Mother Smucker's

7 comments:

  1. Me thinks someone has way too much time on their hands...but I'm so glad they do. This was just the snort I needed before heading to bed...
    "Polly Want a Cracker?"...too funny.

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  2. hi there. I just wanted to thank you so much for your thoughts and sweet words. I cried threw the night and just can't quit. Iam already so empty. It really meant alot for me to read your comments i know how much you love your dogs!!! Thank you so Much!

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  3. those are great...thanks for the laugh!!

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  4. ROTFL...those are brilliant!

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  5. Funny and timely.

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  6. LOL … thanks for the chuckles ;--)
    Hugs and blessings,

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  7. Hilarious - thanks for the laugh!

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